
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/1085980.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Shingeki_no_Kyojin_|_Attack_on_Titan
  Relationship:
      Jean_Kirstein_&_Eren_Yeager
  Character:
      Jean_Kirstein, Eren_Jaeger, Connie_Springer
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_Modern_Setting, jean's_a_gross_art_student, eren_is
      incredibly_virginial
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-12-16 Words: 6126
****** in which david bowie is an enabler ******
by dizzyondreams
Summary
     Eren has had a crush on Connie's weird, basement dwelling art student
     brother Jean for so long. So long. Only, Eren's seventeen and chunky,
     and Jean wears sunglasses indoors and smokes clove cigarettes.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
Eren had barely logged on to his computer before Connie was messaging him.
connie: star wars marathon 6.00 sharp jean’s got enough alcohol to kill a horse
Eren sighed and leaned back in his computer chair, hearing it creak loudly as
he contemplated the hairline cracks in his bedroom ceiling. He rolled his head
to the side, locking eyes with his huge poster of David Bowie.
“Should I go?” he asked. If anyone was a solid judge of a good time, if was
David Bowie.
The poster stared back, silent. Eren snorted in disgust and snapped himself
into an upright position. Connie had messaged him twice in the ten seconds it
had taken for Eren to consult with Bowie.
connie: please come if you don’t I’ll be lonely
connie: jean will pass out and I’ll have no one to admire princess leia with
Eren really didn’t want to flake out on Connie, he really didn’t. Connie was
his one and only friend in the horror that was being a teenager, and a reliable
supplier of smokes, alcohol and weed. But the one factor that was making Eren
pause over his keyboard was Connie’s brother.
Eren had seen him a grand total of three times in the two years of knowing
Connie, and from what Eren had been able to gather from these sightings was
this: Jean lived in the basement and probably considered it a sin to emerge
from the depths for anything less than coffee or cigarettes. Cleaning the paint
off his skin was even lower on his list of important things to do than getting
dressed and dumping out the hordes of ash trays littered around the house. He
was also probably even nerdier than Connie, if that was possible, which was
cool because he owned every comic book ever written and could complete a video
game in a day. Only, he was mildly obsessive about it and Eren had heard that
Jean jerked off to Wonder Woman comics. This may have been a cruel rumour
spread by Connie, or it might not have been. The uncertainty nagged at Eren.
He was also undeniably, unrepentantly, hot.
His hotness was a subtle hotness, buried beneath baggy, paint-splattered t-
shirts, purple eye bags and permanent five o’clock shadow. But it was there. He
was totally toned under those gross t-shirts, and had arms which made Eren
sweat. His jaw was to die for. Jean was the strange object of Eren’s teenage
desires, and because of that Eren tried to avoid him at all costs.
Eren groaned at his computer screen as line after line of question marks popped
up. Connie was an insistent bastard, and a childish one at that.
jaegerbomb: I couldn’t leave you to appreciate princess leia on your own man
I’m in
jaegerbomb: but don’t leave me alone with your creepy brother ok I think
there’s a serious cult issue going on down there
Eren signed off before Connie could begin to discuss cults with him, or
something equally stupid and inane. He surveyed Bowie again, gritting his
teeth.
“I’ll probably make a huge idiot out of myself in front of Connie’s hot brother
because of you.” he accused. Bowie didn’t reply, his paper lips twisted into a
grimace. “Sweet Jesus, you’re unhelpful. Probably won’t even see him, right?”
Nonetheless after changing out of his school uniform, he took about forty
minutes trying to decide on an outfit that would make him look hot. It wasn’t
that he was chunky or anything - pure muscle he’d tell Mikasa - but Connie was
small like a girl and due to living off cigarette smoke and the smell of paint,
Jean wasn’t exactly filling out any of his clothes either. Maybe he should try
going to the gym with Mikasa a bit more.
Eren made a face at himself in the mirror before grabbing his keys off his desk
and shouting to his mother that he was going out.
---------
It was a mile to Connie’s house and by the time he got there he was still
early. He let himself in, because it was goddamn freezing outside and it
usually took an average time of seven minutes before anyone got off their lazy
asses to open the front door.
Connie and Jean lived with their mother, who was normally holed up in the
living room watching her soap operas, and nobody was going to interrupt that,
and Connie and Jean were just plain lazy. They would try and out lazy each
other. At the start of his and Connie’s friendship, when Eren was too polite to
just barge in, he could be on the doorstep for up to half an hour, waiting for
either Connie or Jean to crack and open the door.
He tried Connie’s room first, and when that proved to be empty he headed into
the basement with a sinking stomach. He’d never been to Jean’s room alone
before, and he wasn’t sure if he was entirely ready yet.
He stood at the top of the stairs and bounced on the balls of his feet
nervously.
Jean was one of those unattainable people that Eren always crushed on. When he
was fifteen, it was his History teacher, Levi. He had an undercut and slim
hands and a voice that made Eren want to learn about Hamlet, whoever the fuck
that was.
Then he met Connie, and through Connie, met Jean (if you could call rare
glimpses ‘meeting’ somebody). Jean was one of those people who could have
easily become supremely popular because of his looks. Except he was just a
weird art geek who never spoke to anyone and wore sunglasses inside (which was
kinda douchey but douchey worked on Jean) and was probably a vegan or a
Satanist or something just as interesting. Except he got laid. A lot, if Connie
was to be believed. Jean had this completely unattainable air about him that
made him come off as so aloof that girls literally had to climb over each other
to get at him. Sure, his personal hygiene was questionable, he smoked like a
chimney and had weird habits and a strange undercut thing going on, but he got
more girls than Eren and Connie combined.
Eren bobbed awkwardly on the stairs for a minute before telling himself to suck
it up, go down there and knock.
This turned out to be not such a great plan as not Connie, but Jean opened the
door, looking at Eren through a haze of cigarette smoke.
Eren actually took a step back, then told himself to be cool about it and tried
to lean casually against the wall, though the probably just looked like a plank
of wood propped up. “Oh hey, Jean.” He forced out, trying to sound unfazed by
the sudden appearance of the enigma that was Jean Kirschtein, but only sounding
stupid as his voice slipped. Jean laughed attractively, way too attractively
for someone whose room resembled an actual black pit, and stepped away from the
doorway, gesturing for Eren to come in.
Eren stepped into the room, mentally cataloguing the unmade bed, the dirty
clothes on the floor, the books in waist high stacks, the movie posters
plastering the walls, countless ashtrays, coffee mugs and cans of beer. Most
importantly, however, was the complete and utter absence of a certain short
friend.
“Where’s Connie?” He asked nervously. Jean, who was sloping back to his bed,
cigarette clamped firmly between his lips, shrugged.
“Out with Sasha.” He mumbled through his cigarette.
Eren took a quiet moment to seethe at Connie for ditching him for his
girlfriend, before horror washed over him as he realised the situation.
Jean was sitting on his bed, his back to the wall, a cigarette in one hand and
the remote for the TV in the other. He was looking at Eren expectantly. Eren
took this as his invitation to leave.
“Oh, well, okay then. I’ll be, uh, going I guess.” He spat out quickly before
tripping over himself to get to the door. Jean made a hurt noise behind him.
“You’re gonna leave me to watch Star Wars on my own?” Jean asked in a joking
tone, and when Eren turned around, he was pouting.
Eren felt his mouth opening and closing and eventually managed to blurt out,
“You don’t mind?” and felt like an absolute idiot afterwards.
Jean patted the space on the bed next to him, “Nah, you seem cool.”
Eren vaguely wondered how a level of someone’s coolness could be ascertained
from three very short meetings where no words were exchanged, but hey, he
wasn’t complaining. Jean had just called him cool. Sure, Jean wasn’t cool. He
was uncool, but so uncool that he was cool. It was one of those high school
idiocies.
He wore loads of black and smoked French cigarettes and liked horror films and
he was nineteen and he thought Eren was cool.
It took a lot of willpower for Eren to just shrug and join Jean on the bed. He
was sitting on a bed next to the guy he’d had an entirely ridiculous crush on
for a year. Eren’s palms were definitely getting sweaty.
Jean didn’t say much, Eren realised. He just handed Eren a beer, lit up another
cigarette and hit play on the remote. Eren calmly sipped at his beer, his eyes
fixed firmly on the credits rolling on the screen.
They were maybe an hour into the film before Jean broke the silence. “So how do
you know Connie?” He asked, making Eren jump and slosh beer his front,
swearing.
“Sorry, sorry.” He said quickly, placing his can a safe distance away from him
on a teetering stack of CDs. Jean had got up and was picking through his shirts
on the floor. He tossed one at Eren, who felt his face go hot. No way was he
revealing his chunkiness in front of Jean.
“I’ll turn around if you want.” Jean said diplomatically. Eren almost choked in
embarrassment, and began to stutter out an answer to Jean’s earlier question to
take his attention away from the whole t-shirt debacle.
“I, uh-” He started, but realised he was speaking to Jean’s back. With a huff
he pulled his wet t-shirt over his head and pulled on Jean’s. It was big and
washed thin, smelling of cigarettes and under that a hint of sweat. Eren didn’t
know whether to be grossed out or turned on. Jean came and sat next to Eren
again, his arm brushing Eren’s. Eren tried to block out the dark closeness of
the room and the smell of Jean’s shirt. Definitely turned on.
“I know Connie from parties and stuff.” He said. Jean ‘hmm’ed and when Eren
glanced at him, Jean was looking at him closely, the side of his face lit by
the television screen.
“You don’t go to school with him?” He asked in a low voice. Eren felt like
there was less air in the room.
“Um, no. I go to a Catholic school.” He said, then rolled his eyes to show his
complete and utter contempt for Catholicism, then hoped God was looking away
when he did that. It wasn’t so much faith, but an almost superstitious fear
drilled into him by the nuns.
“Oh.” The atmosphere in the air immediately deflated, and Jean turned his
attention back to the TV, a small smile on his face. “So you’re like sixteen.”
“I’m seventeen.” Eren said shortly, hoping Jean wasn’t going to turn out to be
a total asshole at this very important part of Eren’s pretend relationship with
him.
“Catholic school, shit.” Jean said, laughing a bit. “You have a uniform and
stuff, right?”
“The full works.” Eren said bitterly, shuddering a little at the mental image
of Jean seeing him in his fucking blazer and tie.
“Wow, okay.” Jean said, doing that attractive laugh again. He leant across Eren
to tap his cigarette into the ash tray on Eren’s left. Eren stiffened, feeling
the warmth of Jean pressed against his right side, Jean’s face just inches from
his own. He smelt like the shirt Eren was wearing, and this time Eren
definitely decided to be turned on by it. Which sucked. If only Connie hadn’t
fucking flaked out on him to go bone his girlfriend. He wouldn’t be in this
awkwardly arousing position now and he certainly wouldn’t be catching Jean
Kirschtein staring at his lips, his face so close to Eren’s that he could see
where a bit of green paint had stained Jean’s cheek.
“I bet you’ve never kissed a girl.”Jean announced, effectively blowing smoke in
Eren’s face as he spoke. Eren wiggled backwards in an attempt to get some space
between them. He was part confused, part turned on, and very uncomfortable.
“Have.” Eren retorted. It was technically true. Actually, it was Connie’s
girlfriend, Sasha Blaus. She’d kissed him at a school dance when he was
fourteen and hadn’t quite figured out that boys were way cuter than girls. It
had lasted about .5 of a second and she’d told all of her friends he’d tried to
cop a feel, which mean that Eren was ostracised for a better part of a month.
“I’ve kissed loads of girls.”
“Okay, stud.” Jean said in a teasing tone, raising his eyebrows. Eren felt
himself flush. “I bet you’ve never kissed a guy.”
His best friend Armin Arlet, a year ago. A drunken kiss that felt like kissing
his brother or something. So weird. Eren was a bit shell-shocked afterwards and
had to go cuddle with Mikasa to feel better.
“I’ve kissed guys.” He choked out, tilting his chin up challengingly. Jean
smirked and moved away from Eren’s face, something which made Eren feel very
relieved, but kind of disappointed. Some denial driven part of his mind was
sure that Jean was going to kiss him then, despite his coolness, despite his
two years he had on Eren and the amounts of girls, and guys, that he’d had.
They watched the rest of the film in silence, broken only by the occasional
‘that’s so awesome’ or ‘holy shit that’s rad’. Eren just bit the inside of his
cheek and tried to ignore the awkwardness. When the end credits finally came on
Eren was ready to make a run for it but Jean rattled the box for ‘An Empire
Strikes Back’ and grinned.
“Staying?” He asked, eyebrows raised. “Don’t do a Connie on me.”
“As long as I can smoke.” Eren said, eyes firmly on Jean’s packet of smokes.
Jean laughed, and reached for them. He tapped one out and held it out for Eren
to take. He glanced around for a lighter, cigarette dangling between his lips,
but looking up as he heard the soft snick of a lighter. Jean was holding it
out, a small smile on his lips. Eren tired to remind himself that Jean was a
huge nerdy weirdo, but his brain shut down a little as Jean leant forward and
lit Eren’s cigarette. His eyes were dark and trained on Eren’s mouth.
“Smoking’s such a dirty habit.” He muttered, tossing the lighter on the bed
next to him. He moved away after a second to slot the DVD in the player. When
he came back, Eren was still staring at him, mouth slightly open, cigarette
stuck to his lips. He peeled it away and very carefully set it in the ashtray
next to him. “What?” Jean asked, smiling.
“I’m a terrible kisser.” He blurted out, then looked at Jean in horror. That
wasn’t meant to have come out. Oh God. Now Jean was going to laugh at him and
tell Connie and Connie would text it to everyone he knew and Eren would soon be
the laughing stock of the whole country. He wanted the ground to swallow him
whole. “I mean, oh my God.”
Jean was smirking, but he wasn’t laughing. Eren didn’t know which he’d rather.
“Kissing’s easy.” Jean murmured, moving closer to Eren, who watched him with
wide eyes, face burning. “I’ll show you?”
There was a question in his voice. Now was the time for Eren to ask him to
stop. Just because Jean had some weird thing for Catholic school boys or
something, did not mean he could take Eren under his metaphorical wing and
teach him the ways of kissing.
Then again, Eren totally wanted some lip action from Jean and had been wanting
to for a while now because Jean was totally hot and probably really lean and
toned under all those big hoodies.
Eren just went totally still and didn’t say anything. He corpsed out on Jean
and it didn’t even faze him. Jean actually seemed to take it as confirmation
and scooted closer to Eren on his gross unmade bed.
“I am the master of kissing.” Jean said earnestly, and this was honestly the
most interest Jean had paid him all night. Eren nodded minutely. Jean grinned
and reached to cup Eren’s jaw, to pull him closer, and to tilt his head up.
They were in an awkward position, Eren with his legs crossed, Jean sprawled out
by his side. Eren’s heart was beating distressingly fast, and when Jean’s lips
touched his neck he let out a little gasp, and instantly embarrassed by it.
Jean’s fingers were long and steady on his jaw, fingertips just pressing in
slightly to the soft flesh. His lips travelled up the column of Eren’s throat,
and when he flicked his tongue over Eren’s adams apple, it took all of Eren’s
control to not make a noise. Whether it was the intimate darkness of the room,
lit only by the title screen of the Empire Strikes Back, or the fact that he’d
been fantasising about this for months, but Eren was so hard it felt like his
jeans were two sizes too small, strangling his dick.
“Jean.” He forced out, voice catching as Jean grazed his teeth along Eren’s
jaw. Jean made an inquisitive noise against Eren’s skin. “Connie-”
“You know Connie won’t be home for a while.” Jean said, his words muffled. “And
besides, he’s caught me in far more compromising situations as this.”
Eren almost choked on his own spit. “Okay, kiss me.”
Jean made a pleased noise and pressed his lips against Eren’s.
Eren was pretty sure he blacked out or something. His heart was beating way too
fast and there was a ringing in his ears. He made a strange gasping noise
against Jean’s lips, which Jean obviously liked because he grabbed Eren by the
hair and pulled him even closer. Eren knotted his own hands in Jean’s hair,
fingers skating over the short strands of his undercut. He was kissing Jean
Kirschtein. When Jean swiped his tongue along Eren’s bottom lip, Eren moaned,
unable to help himself, against Jean’s open mouth.
They had completely shifted positions now, due to all the hair pulling and
general flinging themselves around they were doing. Eren was half on top of
Jean, his dick hard on Jean’s thigh. He shifted slightly, and was pleased and
shocked to discover that Jean was hard as well.
He was a total loss of what to do at this point, and when they pulled away from
each other for air, he told Jean this.
“I’m at a loss of what to do at this point.” He said, voice wrecked. His lips
felt swollen, and judging by the way Jean was staring, they probably were.
“I have yet to add a Catholic boy to my blowjob conquests.” Jean said, and Eren
was jealous of how even his voice was. Then his words caught up with him. Eren
gaped at Jean dumbly, not sure of what to say. Jean propped himself up on his
elbows, unconsciously pushing his thigh against Eren’s hard on, which made him
moan and go for Jean’s mouth again. Jean kissed him for a few seconds, his
tongue flicking expertly against Eren’s. Eren couldn’t understand how a guy who
spent so much time in his room alone could be so good at kissing. When he
pulled away, Jean was grinning. “I’m serious, let me blow you.”
It was obvious that Eren was going to have to make a decision. The answer
seemed clear now, in this warm dark room, sprawled on top of this hot guy with
eager lips, but did Eren really want Jean to suck his dick?
“Um, why?” Eren asked. “Like, seriously, I’m seventeen and kinda fat?”
Jean snorted and bared his teeth at Eren, his face lit on one side by the title
screen of Star Wars. “Nah, you’re totally hot I’ve wanted to uh, get to know
you for a while.” Jean did his dumb laugh right in Eren’s face. His breath
smelt of cigarettes. “Now can I blow you?” He asked, tipping his head up to
kiss Eren.
“Um, yeah. Okay. Yeah, okay.” He mumbled into Jean’s lips, feeling them part
into a smile.
“Awesome.” He said brightly, struggling out from underneath Eren, and pulling
him into a sitting position in one smooth motion. It was obviously a practiced
move, and Eren briefly wondered how many other people had sat in this same
position, watching Jean stand up and turn the TV off, leaving the room in
darkness. A lamp as turned on at the other side of the room, and Jean came back
to kneel next to the bed. He kissed Eren’s jean clad knee.
Eren was so nervous he thought he was going to puke as Jean popped the button
on his jeans and tugged his zipper down. He made an embarrassing noise and Jean
snorted. “I haven’t even started yet.” He muttered, but Eren barely heard him
over the fact that Jean’s hand was on his cock.
This definitely wasn’t what he had been expecting when he’d left his house
earlier that evening, Eren thought blindly as Jean’s lips closed over the head
of his cock.
The noise Eren made was embarrassing, and this must just be the night of
embarrassing noises or something, because Eren cannot catch a fucking break.
Jean’s mouth was hot and wet and teasing, sucking lightly at the tip of Eren’s
cock, and Eren had never been harder in his stupid life.
He whined as Jean took his mouth away to press hot, open kisses to the shaft of
his cock, and clenched his fists in the sheets. Jean broke away from mouthing
at his cock to shoot him a mocking grin. “Feel free to put your hands in my
hair.” He said teasingly, before dropping his mouth to Eren’s cock again, still
teasing him with the tip of his tongue.
Eren’s fingers twitched spasmodically in the sheets, staring down at the head
of ash blonde hair in his lap. When Jean took him into his mouth properly,
pressing the flat of his tongue against the head of Eren’s cock, Eren jerked
his hands to twist in Jean’s hair. He moaned, one hand pressing against his
mouth, the other clenched tight around the long strands at the top of Jean’s
head. Jean hummed around his cock, pleased, sending vibrations up his length
that made Eren tip his head back and pant into his palm. “Jean.” He moaned
breathlessly as the other boy curled his hand around the base of Eren’s cock
and began to stoke him in time with his mouth.
Jean broke away momentarily to suck at the underside of Eren’s cock, watching
amusedly through his eyelashes as Eren squirmed and moaned above him. “You can
pull my hair if you want.” Jean said softly, the puffs of air escaping his
mouth cold against the oversensitive skin of Eren’s cock. It took a few seconds
for the synapses in Eren’s brain to reconnect, but when he got the message he
gaped down at Jean, who was tonguing at the vein on the underside of his cock
and smirking. Experimentally, Eren twisted his fingers in Jean’s hair and
tugged. Jean let out a breathy moan and tilted his head into Eren’s hand, his
hand going slack around the base of Eren’s cock, which twitched at the
expression on Jean’s face.
“Fuck.” Eren murmured brokenly, pulling of Jean’s hair again and feeling a hot
rush of arousal pool in his stomach as Jean moaned, his mouth dropping open.
“Fuck, Jean.” This was going into territory that was a lot less vanilla than
Eren had set himself up for. Silently, he cursed his Catholic friends and their
softcore porn. Unsure whether he was being too presumptuous, Eren tugged Jean’s
face back to his cock, which was almost painfully hard now. But Jean just
whined and took his cock into his mouth with no hesitation, his tongue and his
hand moving harder and faster than before. Eren leant back on the hand not
locked in Jean’s hair, not trusting himself to stay upright on his own.
Jean’s tongue was flat and hot on Eren’s cock, and he took him deep enough that
Eren could feel his throat closing on the head of his cock. The tight, wet heat
which encompassed him felt so incredibly good Eren knew he wasn’t going to last
much longer. He pulled on Jean’s hair to keep him still as his hips twitched
forward accidentally, but Jean just took it in his stride, letting his throat
and jaw go slack and shooting Eren a heated look through heavy eyelids. Was he
inviting Eren to fuck his mouth? The thought alone made sparks of arousal run
settle in his stomach.
Hesitantly, Eren pushed his hips forward, then back, savouring the feel of his
cock dragging hot and heavy over Jean’s tongue. When Jean moaned, he picked up
the pace, shivering at the vibrations of Jean’s moan on his cock.
“Ah! I’m gonna-” He broke off as Jean snapped to attention and sealed his lips
around Eren’s cock, sucking and taking him deep just as Eren came, snapping his
hips forward and moaning loudly. His orgasm seemed to go on forever as Jean
moaned around his cock, swallowing as Eren came in his mouth. Eventually, Eren
pushed his head away, his cock too sensitive for Jean’s continued attention to
it. He slumped back against the sheets, breathing hard. He felt unbelievably
blissed out. Like he’d just been struck by a semi made of fucking, clouds or
something. Eren wasn’t feeling too poetic - his brain seemed to have melted and
was currently running out of his ears.
Fuck, he’d just fucked Jean fucking Kirschtein’s face. He’d just fucking came
in Jean fucking Kirschtein’s mouth. David Bowie had really not set him up for
this.
Dimly, he registered Jean heaving himself up next to him on the bed. There was
the unmistakeable sound of a zipper being pulled, and suddenly Eren wasn’t so
tired anymore.
“Wait, let me.” He said abruptly, propping himself up against the wall and
grabbing Jean’s wrist as his hand moved to the waistband of his underwear. Jean
gave him a slightly surprised look, then smirked mockingly, spreading his hands
out by his side.
“Alright, go on.” He said in a husky voice, shuffling to kneel between Eren’s
open legs. Eren tore his eyes away from Jean’s face to focus on the noticeable
bulge in the front of his underwear. He was struck by the realization that he
had absolutely no fucking clue what to do. Desperately, he glanced back up at
Jean, who laughed at him. “Want me to start you off?” He asked teasingly,
before pushing the waistband of his underwear far enough that Eren could see
his dark pubes and the base of his cock. So Jean dyed his hair, go figure.
“Do you want to touch me?” Jean said deliberately, thumb hooked in the
waistband of his pants and eyes heavy and dark on Eren. Eren nodded dumbly, and
sat himself up a little straighter before reaching out to cup Jean’s hard cock
through the fabric. Jean made a low noise in the back of his throat as Eren
squeezed his cock, and sat back on his haunches, hips angled upwards towards
Eren’s hand.
Eren gulped. He was such a fucking virgin. Just pretend that it’s your dick, he
thought to himself as he pushed Jean’s underwear further down and pulled his
cock out. “Oh.” He muttered as he took Jean’s cock into his hand and stared at
it. Jean sniggered.
“I’m not getting any fuckin’ younger, Jaeger.” Jean said teasingly, but his
voice hitched as Eren squeezed the base of his cock to shut him up. Smug
asshole. Just because his cock was bigger than Eren’s.
Eren settled into a steady pace of pumping his hand over Jean’s cock, tight and
slow - just as Jean was instructing him in a low voice between rough moans. It
turned out that Jean was super vocal when it came to sex, which actually didn’t
surprise Eren that much. His voice was so attractive that it’d be a shame if he
wasn’t, really.
“Yeah, fuck, just like that.” Jean murmured, his head hanging heavy on his
shoulders and hands fisted in the shoulders of Eren’s shirt. Eren was surprised
out of his rhythm when Jean tugged him close to plant a heated kiss on his
lips, his tongue sliding wetly over the seam of Eren’s lips until he opened
them in a surprised gasp and Jean surged forward. He was gripping Eren’s jaw,
hard, tipping his head up to kiss him aggressively. Eren moaned into his mouth,
his hand beginning to move on Jean’s cock again, making Jean whine and twitch
his hips up into Eren’s fist.
Jean was still kissing Eren, all biting and clashing teeth, when he came, hot
and messy over Eren’s hand. Jean groaned once, a sharp, bit-off sound that he
muffled in Eren’s shoulder. His hips jerked once, twice, fucking Eren’s fist,
before collapsing against him with a wince.
Eren wiped his hand on the sheets, fairly certain that it wasn’t the worst
thing which had gotten on them, and patted Jean’s thigh uncomfortably. What on
earth was the correct post-orgasm etiquette between two guys? Did they fist
bump and ‘no homo’ it out, or was Eren allowed to rest his face against Jean’s
chest and breathe in the smell of turpentine and cigarette smoke? Judging by
the way Jean was getting all up in his neck, all cuddly and soft and warm, Eren
guessed there wasn’t going to be any fist bumping. Jean was surprisingly
receptive post-orgasm.
“That was-”
Jean made a hushing noise against his skin. “Shut up.”
Eren made an affronted noise but let himself relax a little. The room was warm
and Jean was breathing obnoxiously loud in his ear. Eren wanted a cigarette,
but he felt too drowsy to even try to shift Jean’s warm weight off of him.
He closed his eyes for a moment, and the next thing Eren knew a shaft of
sunlight was blinding him and Connie was yelling in his ear.
“Good morning sunshine!”
“Fuck!” Eren yelled in surprise as he got a pointy elbow to the gut and knocked
his head against the wall he’d inexplicably fallen asleep against. “Wh-?” He
broke off as he took in the scene around him. Jean lying on his back and
groaning, shielding his face from the chink of light that came from the open
basement door, jeans unbuttoned and hair mussed. Eren, he realised with growing
horror, didn’t look much better. He ran his hand through his unruly hair,
trying to flatten it out whilst glaring acidly at Connie, who was practically
cackling with laughter.
“I cannot fucking believe you fucked my fucking brother!” He cried, doubling
over as he laughed breathlessly.
“He only gave me a hand job, you fuck!” Jean yelled back, reaching out a leg to
kick at Connie, who dodged it effectively.
Eren felt like his head was going to come off from embarrassment. “Shut the
fuck up, Connie.” He muttered venomously, lifting his hips up off the bed to
button his trousers back up. “Jesus. I’m fuckin’ out of here.” Ears burning, he
shoved Jean’s legs off of him and stood up shakily. Connie was still almost
crying with laughter.
“I fuckin’ knew it!” He crowed, his voice following Eren as he stomped up the
stairs to the basement, squinting against the bright light of day.
“Stupid, you’re an idiot.” He muttered to himself, trying to get the memory of
Jean’s hands out of his mind. What was he thinking? Why the fuck did he hook up
with his hopeless high school crush? Like Jean would even be interested him as
anything more than a way to pass a boring Friday night. “You’re a tool,
Jaeger.”
He didn’t slam the front door behind him, because he didn’t want to wake Jean
and Connie’s mum up - Eren wasn’t really in the mood to be murdered to death in
the street at 11am. He was halfway down the drive to the relative safety of his
crummy car when he heard a shout behind him.
“Hey, Eren! Wait up!”
Eren rolled his eyes, but stopped anyway because he was sucker like that. Jean
was standing a foot away from him, squinting like he hadn’t seen sunlight for a
few days which, actually, he probably hadn’t. Eren crossed his arms over his
chest and gave Jean a venomous look.
“What.” It could probably have sounded colder, but Jean was wearing a very
stretched out t-shirt that hung off his frame, and Eren was only human after
all. Jean had really nice collarbones.
“Whoa, what’s crawled up your ass, princess?” Jean asked easily, smirking at
Eren. Eren gave him a look of disbelief.
“Are you fucking-” He stopped himself and schooled his anger. Just like your
therapist taught you, Jaeger. “Jean. I’m going home now. Nice meeting you.” He
turned sharply on his heel towards his car, but was pulled up short by Jean’s
hand on his shoulder. He hadn’t had a chance to admire Jean’s hands last night,
but goddamn, they were nice hands. Artistic looking - wide palms and gangly
fingers with large knuckles. Eren remembered how they felt on his cock and
forced himself not to flush.
“Okay, Eren, sorry.” Jean ducked his head and rubbed his hand over the short
strands of hair of his undercut. “I dunno if you’re mad over Connie barging in
or what…” He trailed off, shrugging.
Eren rolled his eyes. “I don’t care about that.” Except that he kind of did,
but whatever, Connie would have found out anyway. “I just wasn’t appreciating
being used for a bit of light entertainment last night.”
Jean actually had the grace to look abashed. “Okay, I understand how you got
that impression-”
“Yeah, because you’ve never even spoken to me before.” Eren interrupted,
feeling childish.
“-But I’ve honestly wanted to talk to you for a while.” Jean ploughed on,
looking embarrassed. “Even though you’re my idiot brother’s jailbait friend.”
He added, almost as an afterthought. Eren bristled, but kept quiet. “So I mean,
like. Last night wasn’t just a one off, okay?”
Eren felt his heart thud weirdly at that, and offered Jean a nervous smile.
“Alright. Cool.”
Jean gave him a thoroughly unimpressed look. “That’s all you’ve got to say? I’m
a very eligible bachelor, Jaeger-”
“Christ, I’m sorry, am I supposed to fall at your feet crying about your
acceptance?” Eren snapped, but there wasn’t any bite to his words. He was too
busy trying to control the grin on his face.
The corners of Jean’s mouth twitched. “I liked you better when you were trying
to impress me.”
The stood there in silence for a moment, sizing each other up. Jean tugged his
t-shirt back over his collarbones, only to have the over-large neck hole to
slip back over his shoulder again. Eren shuffled his feet and tried to look
attractive. Jean broke the silence.
“So do you want to come round and play MarioKart or something tomorrow?” Jean
asked, then hurriedly tacked on “without Connie.” Eren tried to school his
smile into something less horrifyingly dorky, and nodded.
“Yeah, sounds good.” He said, and laughed in surprise when Jean’s hand shot out
to close on his wrist and tug him closer.
“A little something for you to think about.” He murmured, before kissing Eren
with as much intensity as last night. Eren curled his hands in Jean’s t-shirt
and silently thanked whatever God was listening.
------------
The first thing Eren did when he got home later, after kissing Jean on his
front garden for about ten minutes, was march straight up to his room and drop
to his knees in front of his poster of David Bowie.
“God bless you, Ziggy Stardust.”
End Notes
     this is really stupid AND also the first jean/eren fic i've ever
     written so like. sorry about this.
     idk i really like the idea of super weird gross art student jean. and
     age differences. and awkwardly chunky virgin eren. WHO CARES. i don't
     care. i care a lot i hope u enjoyed this stupid fic.
     also suspend disbelief that connie and jean are related. maybe jean's
     adopted and that's why he wallows in his room so much. wait, i'm
     making myself sad BYE
     also don't try to tell me eren wouldn't have some dorky username like
     jaegerbomb it's probably the only enjoyment he gets out of that
     goddamn name
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